April Fools!

The truth is: I couldn't care less about politics. But I'm married to a guy who doesn't care for President Obama's policies. So earlier this year, I thought it might be fun to stick an Obama bumper sticker on his car on April Fools day. Then he would drive around without noticing it until he suddenly noticed that HE HAD BEEN DRIVING AROUND WITH AN OBAMA STICKER! And nobody would care except him. But boy would he care. Oh man, it would be so funny.

In March I got online and ordered a free bumper sticker from the Obama campaign. Then I got excited and started waiting. I don't know why I thought it would only take a week or two for a free sticker to ship, but unfortunately, it didn't. So the funny trick never happened.

This week the sticker finally came in the mail, and it was even better than I had planned, because no one expects to be pranked in October. I came home to find Ben standing over an opened envelope, addressed to my code name: Mik Mocnarf, saying, "I think someone's messing with me. I know this is an anagram, but I can't figure out for what. Can you believe someone would send me an Obama sticker?"

Bell's Palsy

I went through a phase where I only smiled with half my face, for some reason. I don’t remember why. I don’t even remember doing it.

But luckily I have the pictures to prove it. Otherwise I might be slightly concerned that all of my recent photos look like I have pirates for children.

Working Overtime

Ben designs giant heating blankets for a living. At least that’s how I understand it. They wrap the blankets around oil tanks and other things that shouldn’t freeze when the weather gets cold.

The other day Ben and Eliza were playing with her Cinderella play dough set. When I walked in, Ben said, “I have no patience for this. Wrapping a 3D object with a 2D object? It’s like my job all over again.”

Good Thing I Got That Bachelor's Degree in Linguistics

Qué es un bosque? I have no idea. Based on the picture, I would guess it’s some sort of rainforest with giant mushrooms.

We’re less than two weeks into first grade, and Liam is already smarter than me.

Pillow Talk

Last night as we were lying in bed, about to fall asleep, Ben casually mentioned that sometimes when he pulls up to an intersection, he tries to figure out how he would get through in an invisible car.

He said, “The oncoming traffic and the cars going perpendicular wouldn’t be a problem. It’s just the cars coming from behind…” I started to doze off, but a minute or two later I heard him say, “That’s probably why Wonder Woman had an invisible jet.”

A Day of Firsts

I just dropped my giant son off at his first day of first grade, and I won’t see him again for almost SEVEN HOURS. This feeling I have in the pit of my stomach, which started when the teacher said, “Parents: it’s time to say your good-byes; you need to stay outside,” can’t possibly be any different from the feeling parents get when they drop their missionaries off at the MTC.

Using My Third Grade Math Skills

I almost just went to bed, at 9:00 p.m. on a Saturday. Then I remembered that it’s August 25th, and on the 25th day of any month I think it’s kind of fun to figure out what fraction of a year old I am that month. My birthday is April 25th, so today is my 1/3 birthday.

But this year I’m 33, so it's actually my 33 1/3 birthday. Today I’m one-third of a century old! What a milestone! I can’t believe I almost slept through it.

Lego Phone Adventures

I just overheard Liam telling Eliza that she could only play the Cinderella level, because all of the other princesses were locked. I asked him what they were playing, and he said, "Princess Adventures."

"On what?" I asked. He said, "It's a game on my phone." I asked him what phone he was talking about, and he said, "My lego phone."

Pretty Sure It's a Land Line

Liam just brought in his phone and stuck it in its charger, because, "It only has 12% battery life left."

Way to be responsible, Liam.

Sloppy Work, Tooth Fairy

The other day Liam lost his second tooth. I hung $2 on the fridge after he went to bed, because I have a horrible memory and I knew he wouldn't get tooth money unless the tooth fairy could see that money before she went to bed.

A little while later, Liam came downstairs to ask me something. Then he went back to bed.

The next morning I asked Liam if the tooth fairy had come. He found the two dollars under his pillow, and then said, "You put this under my pillow, didn't you?"

I said, "Whaaaaaaat???"

He said, "I saw these two dollars on the fridge last night."

I'm absolutely not ready for my 6-year-old to be finished believing in things--especially after only two teeth--so I hurried and found two more dollars to stick on the fridge when Liam was in the bathroom.

Hopefully Eliza doesn't notice that I raided her piggy bank.